SUDDENLY JOBLESS? Feeling ENDANGERED? EVICTABLE? POOR? This isn't a problem if a lot of your friends are also out of jobs. COMMUNITY is the ANTIDOTE to the deadly trend of firings, corporative pensions evaporating*, industry in flight to India, joblessness, eviction and recession. Collect your harried chums and rent a house together, guys! BIG FAWNCY one with a huge garden where you can plant fruit trees, grow your own vegies, berry vines. (A tiny box of dumpster diver berries gives you hundreds of vines!) Every member of the boarding house has two nights a week where they are responsible for cooking a gourmet dinner.
HOW TO AFFORD IT? Everybody, quick, before the eviction notices come, while you're still feeling charming and physically strong, give a garage sale. Advertise the expensive things you own in the posh side of town on Craigs List, on Ebay, bulletin boards at super markets where the wealthy shop. At healthfood stores, At metaphysical book shops. At boutiques or on phone poles outside them and on the streets near your apartments, on phone poles, FRIDAY night before the weekend. Advertise the big money items at Carriage trade fooderies and such. Don't pay for newspaper ads. That's passe. Put the piano or VCR OR BIG SCREEN TV in the RECYCLER or online at CRAIGS LIST which has free ads.
Recently I helped a geezer sell his 90 yrs of acquired stuff when this little ole widower was evicted from a rented house. ( He got a great apartment, so don't worry for him.) I proved to him how HOT CRAIGS LIST is. I put each item in a separate ad IN ITS OWN DIVISION, at craigs list, but always put the other items under it. One ad brought ten phone calls or emails minimum!
Sell the big cash stuff, the plastic pool, the bikes, the piano first, sell the old cars, the second, dead car in your current garage. Your pals dot he same. Then when all of your pals have divested of big, clunky worth a lot of money kinds of articles, RENT a cute cheap shack! NOT AN APARTMENT. There are many of you, apartments would be an emotional bummer and a house is NOT. Almost the same rent these days too!
People who have a piano, four cars, a big police dog they love, and a lot of furniture --- can’t easily let their household be blown by the winds of chaos in a big city that is experiencing inflation, joblessness. NOT YOU! You’re old hands at moves. At hauling crap. At U-HAUL l9$ a day rental trucks. Move the SOIL in your huge trash cans.
Next, ponder the paperwork of renting houses. Several pals of mine did it with entirely bogus credit. I will confess that even I HAVE done it with bogus credit (as Mr and Mrs C.S. when C really is my fab rich perfect credit brother and the man I wheeled in and presented as Mr C.S. was my DAD who had a name nearly the same as my bro. MY BRO was ok with it as he can't be sued by landlord ever if he never livedin the house. You can't sue my DAD. Four wives and a Mexican investment counselor left him peniless.
Now what's funny is that my landlord is a career real estate man, who should have checked better, but heck, ole Al and I looked (when we first visited him) like nice people. So we handed him Bro Chuck's bank account paperwork and job history all those fine STOCK accounts, with numbers. That worked BIGTIME. But of course you may actually have some serious bank accounts too. Look good on a profile! DARE to show up as a YUPPIE COUPLE in A HONDA. Take that gorgeous hooker you know, put her in a mannish pant suit, wheel her in and tell the landlord she's a freelance bookkeeper. That explains her lack of a 'job' but implies she's super reliable and cash smart.
You and your pals could rent a much cuter house and for less money than mine. I'm in expensive L.A. (we call it HELL-A, lately) Mine is four bedrooms, 8thousand square feet of garden only 995$ a month. You could do it too, as Mr and Mrs. SOMEBODY OR OTHER. A couple is a stable profile. Couples are viewed as more stable than sister/brother or man/man or two women. So wheel in a hetero pair.
My lil half brother Chrissy did the "WE ARE A COUPLE" bit with his credit profile as a SAG/aftra working stiff and with his lil sister Jenny’s profile, working at local florist shop. They looked like such a cute couple though at night they'd get into fist fights.
And my bro even got the little sausage dog in on the lease as a "yard dog" only, and then my canny bro brought the HUGE FAT GERMAN SHEPHERD in a few days later, when the landlord left. That landlord never got into the garden again, nor did he ask to. Behind a fence one woof sounds pretty much like another.
Isn’t it best for all involved to organize now, to do the thinking, the scoping out? Sure, you’re young and sure it seems fine to blow like chaff in the wind, to go bunk at some pal’s house. That other pal or two who are facing joblessness and eviction they probably have pals also. You could ‘float' but it’s all so transitional. AND TWO CAN NOT LIVE as cheaply in a separate mode as they could together!
TWO apartment rents of 800 to a thousand Plus utilities is dumb when you can get a big house like mine for 995 (which I pay in 2006) and share utilities. And keep the dog. And if either of you gets a sweetie, not a problem. Three. Four. Does your landlord check the sheets? NO! I don't think so!
You and your jobless pals have bonded a great deal during this American emergency. I think you both are capable of never returning to the HOUSE-OCCUPANT irritation of your early years. YOU learn to get along with a jerk in the other bedroom and you help the planet get along.
Jews and Palestinians were ONE PEOPLE 5,000 years ago, brother/sister. You help the planet be good to its brothers when you two can be. Plus you have a garage band together. That works! The family that plays together stays together!
You both want to launch yourselves in interesting, artistic careers, you and your jobless pal. Well what better than a big house and garden? If you are a woman reading this, you may want to launch yourself in another long term way, in marriage. It's not only a FUN thing to create a zappy rented houit's a good strategy to have little dinner gatherings, spaghetti and red wine and salad, have friends over, friends bringing other friends, so your circle grows.....be very ‘bohemian artist-y’ and supported by the gang that views you as HOSTS, with a big screen TV and all your DVDS on the shelves....and not floating in the wind leaning on pals sleeping on the floor or couch....but to be mutually supportive, without attitude, working on your music group and all it entails. I mean being social with other music people....and you know what? That takes a ‘conventional’ setting. Where there’s a garage for a band and where the house is well run so that a man LOOKS at your gal pal roomie and says, "cute plus she’s got nice friends and roomates, it's a nice group. She obviously has cooking talents; she’d be a fab wife."
A WOMAN has to cook, clean and serve up great food to attract a conventional thing like marriage. So your girl roomies have to learn to cook Gourmet, MOOSEWOOD CAFE type healthfood meals. NOT potatoes out of a box of powder in a beat up pan that you wouldn’t use to water a dog! Not Frying meat in SLICED UP TEFLON PAN? A CUTE kitchen you all put together..
I can see the wisdom to the group of chums you have getting a rental house at a low price, keeping your communal pets ‘til the end of their days.
The apartments you and your pals live in now are not very inspiring or trendy or young. They're dismal and have bad memories. You could as a group of TWO, pick your best TWO, qualify for a HOUSE rental and end up paying much less than you’d pay if you lived separately, in apartments. Get a cottage like mine. Cottages rent cheaper. The shacky look.
So plan on living well, cheaply, VIBRANTLY. Each buys his own food and for parties, installs his own deadbolt lock on his bedroom door as good fences make good neighbors. You share half and half on rent, share the light bill. Turn off lights l00% in daytime! A nice house which somebody's pooch will protect! A garage band...writing songs. LIving room study groups open to the community.
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*II.) YOUR PENSION BEING PHASED OUT BY BOSS? As of DECEMBER 2005. CORPORATIONS all over USA are notifying workers, the 401K feast is over with. NO MORE 401k matching by them! Grandfathered-in pensions must roll onwards on their own. NOTHING more will be contributed by the boss. If you are an in demand worker, you can ask for matching, however. If enough people walk away from jobs offered, who knows what the Fortune 500 corps will have to do with this no match policy.READ up on how 401 SHELTER BEING PHASED OUT BY GOVERNMENT, ENDING THE "WORKERS' PARADISE!"
LAST TIP. While you're doing all the rest of these things, put your resume up at Monster.com, Hotjobs or Careerbuilder.com as I know people who got big salary jobs there. Employers don't want to pay hefty fees to headhunters and will hire there.
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Our POSTER is ANITA SANDS HERNANDEZ, Los Angeles Writer, Futurist and Astrologer. Catch up with her websites TRUTHS GOV WILL HIDE & NEVER TELL YOU, also The FUTURE, WHAT'S COMIN' AT YA! FRUGAL LIFE STYLE TIPS, HOW TO SURVIVE the COMING GREAT DEPRESSION, and Secrets of Nature, HOLISTIC, AFFORDABLE HEALING. Also ARTISANRY FOR EXPORT, EARN EUROS. Anita is at astrology@earthlink.net ). Get a 35$ natal horoscope "my money/future life" reading now + copy horoscope as a Gif file graphic! No smarter, more accurate career reading out there!
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