Many people work side by side with space aliens who look human—but you can spot these visitors by looking for certain tip-offs, say experts whom we quote here. They listed 10 signs to watch for:

1. Odd or mismatched clothes. "Often space aliens don’t fully understand the different styles, so they wear combinations that are in bad taste, such as checked pants with a striped shirt or a tuxedo jacket with blue jeans or sneakers."

2. Strange diet or unusual eating habits. Space aliens might eat French fries with a spoon or gobble down large amounts of mysterious, no-label pills, the experts say.

3. Bizarre sense of humor. Space aliens who don’t understand earthly humor may laugh during a serious company training film or tell jokes that no one understands. So do schizophrenics, so be certain of your diagnosis.

4. Takes frequent sick days. "A space alien might need extra time off to ‘rejuvenate its energy’," said Dr. Thomas Easton, a theoretical biologist and futurist.

5. Keeps a written or tape-recorded diary. "Aliens are constantly gathering information."

6. Misuses everyday items. "A space alien may use correction fluid to paint its nails" If he dries his socks in micro-wave, uses Hanes boulder holders as a rucksack, don’t think schizophrenia, think extra-galactic.

7. Constant questioning about customs of co-workers. "Space aliens who are trying to learn about earth culture might ask questions that seem stupid," Easton said. "For example, a co-worker may ask why so many Americans picnic on the Fourth of July." Or why people like Robert Redford so much or what’s all the fuss about Ben and Jerry’s or Starbucks.

8. Secretive about personal lifestyle and home. "An alien won’t discuss domestic details or talk about what it does at night or on weekends."

9. Frequently talks to himself. "An alien may not be used to speaking as we do, so it may practice speaking."

10. Displays a change of mood or physical reaction when near certain high-tech hardware. An alien may experience a mood change when a microwave oven is turned on.
The expert pointed out that a co-worker would have to display most if not all of these traits before you can positively identify him as a space alien.

11. Nudity in public. Say in diners. Pool Halls. (ala TERMINATOR).

12. Talking to self. They aren't really it just looks that way.

If you find an alien, call information in Washington DC and ask Information Operator to give you the phone # of The Men in Black.

"The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing." Edmund Burke