seedy vegan hippie needs room in nice houseI AM an HOMELESS, UN-SHOWERED, POOR GNOME, LIVING UNDER BRIDGES. Do you have a room to rent? I get a big disability check so I could pay well for a permanent dwelling in someone's nice extra BEDROOM. 400$ or 500$ a month maybe?

Hey, Mr. Gnome, HOUSE FINDING is going to be easy. Go online to website "NEXT DOOR" (your city's name here.) or to Craigs list or Easy ROOM MATE. Email each landlord offering room and bath an attractive email letter stating I have car and am employed, I am home weekends only and post dinner hour.  Tell the little personal things that explain WHY and adult would need somebody's room, like "I just divorced, or I just arrived in the city, or My current roomie drank and I don't or my roomie smoked and I don't. Or I think he was a skinhead. LIE LIKE  A RUG. You have to up all of your attractive features bigtime so your shipwrecked appearance does not get in the way. So your tawdry areas are balanced out.

This will work. You will find a very cheap room that becomes a cozy home for you. I know.The most homeless, difficult to place man on earth, living in a van with his cat, found a room in Los Angeles for 500$ a month. He was an ex beauty, PLAYGIRL MAG had him as a center fold. He was Vegan, a meditator, handsome at 65, a Good person but down on his luck, terrible teeth, skinny, starved looking, always had a beard shadow but he got a room in a palace in our gorgeous San Fernando Valley,20 miles north of BeverlyHills. With a chatty old senior woman who loved cats.

HOW? Well, he went in the CRAIGS LIST share house/ room pages and PHONED or EMAILED every home, talked to every single landlord -person with elegance and got a meeting arranged. He walked in with his cat ELMER on a leash. ELmer was a major hit!

cat goes anywhere if you use a leashOf course the landlord was so susceptible. Not only because of the adorable pet but the 500$ a month was double down sweet. See, Dozens of seniors are having problems with taxes and house mortgage and that is why ALL the landlords were interested in meeting a man with a sizeable PENSION check monthly, vegan, non smoker,non drinker.

So my chum washed the van, leashed up ELMER & showed up on time. To some extent, it was my chum's clean white on white suit/ shirt, clean white shoes clean bright blue socks but most of all the adorable cat ELMER. My hippie chum got his pick of the various rooms across the city of L.A. All had private baths. Some had big gardens so his cat could be an in and out reg'lar person. Not a shut-in!  IF any landlord would have demanded that, my chum would have turned them down. He had so many landlords anxious to take him. Cuz he had manners and Etiquette.
And ELMER with his matching blue leash.

What Is the Etiquette When You Rent a Room in a House?

(found online)

You won’t get an etiquette manual when you rent a room in house, but there are unwritten rules that you need to be aware of. The owner of the house, or your other housemates, may not have the courage to confront you on issues, until it’s too late and they want you to leave. Avoid basic etiquette mistakes by following these guidelines and even drawing up a printed LEASE where you cover them and promise and will sign for new landlord's trust quotient.

Long Distance Calls

Don’t make long distance calls from the house phone until you have permission. Before you rent a room, ask how you’ll contribute to bills, including the telephone bill. Find out whether you’re allowed to make long distance calls, and the expectations for how and when you’ll pay your portion of the bill. In a world where everyone seemingly owns a cell phone, this may seem like a moot point. However, there are times and areas of the country where a cell phone signal is not available, and you’ll have to rely on a land line to make calls. The best way to control your spending and not add to the owner’s telephone bills is to buy a calling card.

Other People’s Food

When you rent a room in a house, you’ll probably be sharing a refrigerator. Even if you buy a dorm fridge for your room, you’ll need access to a freezer at some point. A major source of contention among housemates is stolen food. Don’t eat food that you didn’t purchase without your house mate’s permission, no matter how hungry you get. Even if no one says anything, they will notice it and your actions can lead to HUGE resentment. Avoid the temptation to eat other people’s food by keeping up with your own groceries. While you’re at it, buy snacks every once in a while for everyone to enjoy, or prepare a dinner for the household. Food brings people together and sharing a meal is an excellent bonding activity for housemates.

Communal Areas

Clean up after yourself when you use communal areas. It’s poor etiquette to put off cleaning until later, when your housemates want to use the same areas that you’ve left uncleaned. Go beyond that though, and share in the responsibility to clean communal areas. For example, you may rarely use the living room in the house because you’re hardly there. However, you should help clean it by yourself or when you see the owner or others clean it. It shows that you care about the house you’re staying in, and not just a stranger who rents a room.

House Mate Conflict Resolution

Getting along with your housemates is key if you want to live there, especially when they own the house. There are ways to handle conflict in a manner that are not rude. Approach the owner in a professional manner, the way you would the landlord of an apartment building. Bring issues to their attention, and ask their advice on how to resolve it. Offer solutions and try to resolve it positively, whenever possible. If you can’t resolve a major conflict this way, then no amount of etiquette will suffice. You should look to rent a room somewhere else.

If you drive, don't overlook the parking situation. Is your car safe in the neighborhood and safe parked for some days and others NO?

GET YOUR OWN FRIDGE if possible, 100$ at IKEA. Thigh High. Or Find out if there's a system in place for refrigerator and kitchen cabinet space. And your toaster oven, very important or your single burner. Or are there stove privileges? Would the senior landlord like you to cook a few nights a week? You promise to clean up after. Share costs.

 If sharing wifi with roommates, although not recommended, find out how good the wi-fi is. Check out the wi-fi login and set up first day in the apartment. Ditto cable. Or does a digital aerial work at that home? My chum tells me his PC gets netflix and Russian TV news so you don't need anything else. Our news channels lie like rugs.

FOR SENIORS OR FAMILIES WITH A HOUSE --WHO WANT TO RENT A BEDROOM to a stranger.

You can probably use 500-600 dollars extra each month. Put your ad in the regular channels and prepare for an onslaught of people. 70% are kids with their first jobs, 10% unemployed people with no money just TALL STORIES,  20% are lonely seniors. It's a real grab bag. Prepare yourself to go against the grain. DO NOT TAKE AN OLD DEPRESSED SENIOR who looks honest and reliable. They are tedious, present all the time and under foot and TALKING, talking. First time you say 'get a life' they hate you.

Avoid unemployed scammers by asking for proof of employment, stubs, etc. ANY hesitation "nice-Nice" them out the door.

Then try to determine which EMPLOYED young adults have emotional issues. Those you nice nice away also. TWO things provide indicators, lots of back and forth by email, asking personal questions and then, an in person meeting with the prospective tenant. That double sniff will key you into everything.

Racial Issue. Ethnics have issues and can be judgemental to white prosperous people. In an argument, they can be hard on you. Avoid them and Avoid all adults who were fostered or orphaned as children. Deep scars bleed forever. Scars SING. Neurosis is Worse than ethnic issues. PAINED PEOPLE are cracked souls, so ASK. It'll seem an innocent enough question. I didn't ask last time around & got a tenant who seemed educated, elegant, rich. Had worked at Ron Reagan's law firm, biggest in USA. But 4 heart attacks later, he was droopy, jobless. His adopted Mom wrote his checks though he was 55 yrs old and FIRST MONTHS OF HIS LIFE in a crib with no MOM, he is demanding, strident, angry, bossy, does not retard his SCREAMS & is just this side of utterly crazy but an informed right winger and I learn alot about the intricacies of hard core conservatism, he is way UP on Trump's greatness and NASTY Memogate, the full spectrum of prejudices of the right wing conservative. I FIND HIM A CASE!

ISSUE OF Lease/ official papers? If you have a printer. I didn't so I just forgot about paperwork and depended on my judgement. But best is to VISIT THIS LEASE TEMPLATE WEBSITE, pick one, hand write or print that lease out & make the tenant take you to a xerox shop, get it signed and copied 3 times and their driver's license too and if it's Taco Tuesday take them to lunch.


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