FUKUSHIMA MON AMOUR (CONSPIRACY THEORY FOR SURVIVORS OF THE SIXTIES)
or -- CHARLIE SHEEN EXPLAINS the "ILUMINAMI " TO YOU.
DUDLEY DO-RIGHT: Hey Sheen, dude, is this Quake and Tsunami business LIKE A Haarp-driven BLACK OP gone WILD ? Is like the Japanese Earthquake Catastrophe some Illuminati false flag op, only much bigger?
CHARLIE SHEEN: Nah. What would be the CUI BONUM in that? You gotta understand the CEOs who bankroll these nucleactor type businesses. The reason that they put a Nuke plant on faults is A) they know you're dumb and want to pay high for cheap light, B. They're stupid and they all live in Paris France and no blowby there! C) They're arrogant sonsabitches, probably own a lot of studios, dummie newspapers and tv networks, control the media so you can't get their dumb asses!.
DUDLEY: Yeah but they aren't dumb, they must be pretty smart if they have studios newspapers, networks, nucleactors and live in Paris France and all that.
CHARLIE SHEEN: If evil is smart! I am the voice of experience I give studio heads, bankers and politicans credit for brains but not morals. They rigged the whole game, from the time of the Venetian bankers -- They planned this event thirty years ago when they built these nucleactor things. Get their money in, get it out, collapse 'em --every generation. has been Starlet, promo them into Big star, fire their asses find the new starlet, promo them.. make new ones, better, bigger.. get some more money --.
DUDLEY: Dude, no one going to do that much work for some black op 30 years in the future... It takes years to build a power plant and millions upon million of dollars and massive planning in full view of the public. I've worked on that type of construction before before the back went out and the disability and all.
CHARLIE SHEEN. your back isn't all that's out!
DUDLEY: Dude, it is! Your meltdown is seriously getting to you!
CHARLIE SHEEN: Take that to the bank! But I earned mine. My meltdown has been a few years in the making and hurt nobody but myself. THEIR MELTDOWN has been in "planning" for thirty years which is a gnat wink to these people and they will kill millions. I know these bozos. Greed incorporated. Shoot an episode in six days, fix it in post... Hire has-beens, pay the cattle bottom dollar. You dn't fire them then you'd pay the state, no you fire the STAR! Leave him divorced and in debt.
DUDLEY: You get 2 million an episode, man
CHARLIE SHEEN: NOW I DO! That's why they're collapsing me like a nucleactor. Get the picture, Dude The land was cheap because its their Maine, fergawdsakes and they all KNEW about the fault that everyone knew was there. Just like hire an addict to star in your series you get a great rip cord when you wanna yank it but even a mindless moron might want to think twice about building near that crack! Earthquakes are nothing to *#%* with, so why do it? Those plants cost beaucoup money - Dude, you're not seeing the forest. They did this on purpose! Buy cheap, shoot a great pilot, sell it for beaucoup then trim the crew. Lose the extras!Adios Sheen! GENO-CIDE!
DUDLEY: GENOCIDE?
CHARLIE SHEEN: YEAH. Illuminati moola grabbing PLOT! Been there done that.
DUDLEY: I guess we'll have plenty of genocide if that Fuku reactor blows.
CHARLIE SHEEN: Dude, It's not about IF, it's about WHEN and if not this one the next event and the one after that. The earth is moving! This isn't an Iluminami, bro, except in the sense they built nukes recklessly in quakeville!
DUDLEY: They didn't intend to kill us?
CHARLIE SHEEN: The illuminati matrix banker galactic overlords do not NEED to go looking to murder people destroy villages and overturn boats but hell, they don't care if they do. Cuz what's for them to be afraid of? Your big movie star dad gonna hit them with a stick? I don't think so! Mine didn't! Just 'why aren't you in rehab. Rehab, Charlie.' Like a stuck-freakin' record. Reactors go down here and there and sure, SOME of the people villages, boats and businesses go down, La-de-Fuckin-DA! Cuz they got plenty others. A billion bucks to build a new one is nothing. It's an illusion that paychecks to the slaves who build reactors is money SPENT. It is money earned. They can build reactors on faults because the HOUSE has the ADVANTAGE. The CASINO had the stats. The system gets the moola back in taxes, rentals, housing projects. The worker buys system's food, pays rent into system, then the housing project builder and system both get to charge the slave every day for light/ electricity. They exploit us, man. Work us to the bone.. Get the picture DUDLEY?
DUDLEY: Yeah. Say, any more weed in that pipe?
CHARLIE SHEEN: (passing pipe,) See, the deal is, they knew this was going to happen. Nature does this every 80 decades or so. No biggie, it's still a win-win for them. And Them is the SYSTEM. The building provides thirty years of WIN WIN for all of them., and --- just as the WTC or the REACTOR gets old, out of style, too much asbestos, too few containment walls, they cancel its ticket. G.E. has a new design. Hire some more slavies ---KHUFU builds a new pyramid. The billion bucks aren't wasted, not a penny of it. Built in obsolescence provides a harvest to this kind of investment! A new generation of workers even more desperate for a job will build Khufu a new Pyramid. System has us by the ruby begonias!
(We pull back as the boys toque gently and thoughtfully on their boo. Pan to window. Waves crashing on the Malibu sand.) Then we hear Charlie scream:
IS GOD A BUNGLER? How Did This HAPPEN?
Aging reactors to heaven go! No biggie! Hey, you grab
that village there, I'll go for the reactor...Wait, that's
MALIBU. That's Charlie's house....Pull back. Charlie is
in there. Charlie is God now. They fired the OLD GOD!
PULL WAY BAAAAcK!Author's Note. No Illuminati or fired sit-com actors were impugned, harmed or USED in the making of this article. It is just a comedic riff.
AS IF the illuminati could build 54 reactors somewhere cold where everyone would pay BIG for light and heat (even if they'd built on the biggest most predictably fragile crack on the planet) --
AS IF these galactic overlords could afford to lose all 54 reactors every century or so --
AS IF they could just pocket that profit made between tsunamis and each time fund the building of another 54 reactors --
AS IF they'd do such a thing every century even if 10,000 died each time --
AS IF they'd do that again and again ad infinitum.
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