FUN (but true) APHORISMS
 

“A renunciate’s primary responsibility is to refuse to support all illusions in others. And to renounce and refuse all speech that is illusion, and to speak truth to power in all circumstances. They stand in a set apart position, even in relation to their own traditions.”  – Adi Da Samraj  "When you give food to the poor, they call you a saint. When you ask why the poor have no food, they call you a communist.- Archbishop Helder Camara, Brazilian liberation theologian"***Worrying about something is praying for it to happen." New Age California Yoga student.** "Where's thas muck, thas brass"  (where there is dirt there is money) " old Yorkshire (very muddy, rainy place,) and it was a pigfarmer who said that. "Attempt things that are so ambitious audacious and HUGE that they will fail if God Himself doesn't intervene. " (From marquee of a Venice California church.)   "There is no such thing as luck. There is only adequate or inadequate preparation to cope with a statistical universe. "  Robert Heinlein ***"The arrow that hits the target is the result of a l00 that do not hit their mark." Buddhist saying. **"I am a winner when I allow myself to be a loser." Buddhist author. ***"HOUSEWORK is the only task which, done properly, no one notices, but not done, EVERYONE notices ---leaving no speculation why males can't be bothered to ever do a bit of it. This author "Nobody's met a human being; the first one hasn't been been born yet." Jean Houston "***Don't raise wind where no wind is blowing." Buddhist text. Under the ice of Winter, roots move invisibly thinking 'summer fruit.' This Author ** "Unthinking respect for authority is the greatest enemy of truth." (Albert Einstein) or say it this way: "If everyone says yes to the boss you get Rumania." Me to my producer boss, frequently, until he fired me for not agreeing with him. **"Humans angrily trample the redwood seedling they never saw growing in the space they were saving while praying for a redwood." Me. **"Art should describe something exotic we have never seen, something that is not yet, that one day might be. Art SHOULD anticipate evolution." Me."A quarter of what you eat keeps you alive. The other three quarters keeps your doctor alive."**"The purpose of the govm't is to impede progress. " a wise cynic."SLOW DOWN THE MOUTH, YOU SPEED UP THE BRAIN." Me." "WHILE ALL PRETTY SHOES pinch, I never saw an uncomfortable sandal. Me ""SELF LOVE is a blessing, a private thing, self known only. It's nickle and dime, 'mom and pop' sainthood, in a silent, humble way. Yet there's nothing grander. This knowing of one's mission and attention to the work involved, breeds goodness, direction and miraculous events. This last is a phenomenon of nature, quietly generous and not unlike the world's # 1 anonymous donor, the OCEAN which puts water into the atmosphere, creating an invisible cloud that feeds lakes a thousand miles away and causes rivers to run, and irrigates all fields putting food on all tables while no man can see when or how this is done. Self love causes similar miracles.""The only way to get where you're going is a STRAIGHT line."Wherever you're going, you're going from HERE, so here is perfect."Girls: never phone a man, never GIVE to a man. Never ask for more of his love or time. But DO ask for more money. A good woman is a taker. A good man is a giver. " Dr Pat Allen "Beware of two things only: the love of gold and the love of the opposite sex. " Great 19th Century mystic Ramakrishna **"There are only two things that make people crazy enough to call a psychic: Love and Money. " Anita "If you aren't living every minute as ecstasy, ask yourself what your "if only " is. (Like, if only I were rich). Your "If Only" is what is standing in the way of your enjoying the greatest E ticket ride there is." Ram Das'Why' (we did things) is the worst question for man to ask, but the only question God ever asks."There is a bus leaving every minute. Be on all of them." LSD philosopher. "Don't discuss or react so much to life. It's worse than just an illusion. It's a B movie.""There are no deaths, no endings, no absolutes...EVER."If Mother Teresa looked like Michelle Pfeiffer she'd learn to -----------, marry the Sheik of Oman, and put wells, generators, schools and clinics in every miserable village in the third world."You can accomplish anything if you don't care who gets the credit. "The truth awaits the mind unclouded by longing. " Ancient Chinese philosopher. An agenda gets in the way of the trip. "The perfect way is without difficulties, save that it entails picking and choosing. The conflict between right and wrong is the sickness of the mind." The third patriarch of Zen. "Soul is everywhere Mind isn't.""The swamp is a fine place to visit for a bag of compost but a lousy place to live." "GOOD IDEAS DIE AWAY LIKE FIREWORKS. Memo pads, Dayrunners, SCHEDULES PUT THE FIREWORKS IN OUR LIFE FOREVER." "POWER is like a garden TOOL. It should not be stuck in your right hand. Such an ugly thing should be in the closet when you're not using it."You gotta rip holes in the earth to get OIL. "To strike oil, you don't dig fifty one-foot holes, you dig one fifty-foot one." LBJ "While there is one child weeping on this planet, none of us will know happiness."He who has lost a cheating lover and a nickle has lost a nickle."Men are incapable of being god-like. When they try to be God, they get tangled in bullshit, lies and vanity and end tripping on their own ego. Which isn't saying that God isn't a man. A few SOMEWHERE probably are. "You bring just as much unhappiness into this world when you take offense as when you give it. "Feed a snake milk he'll but turn it to poison." both me. "Give to a man he'll hate you; give to a woman she is grateful" Dr Pat Allen. "Hogamous higamous man is polygamous; higamous hogamous, woman's monogamous."***"Testerosterone is the devil's own hormone; that's why God made so little of it. **"When I am absent He is present. "Stop bemoaning the cup half empty --FEEL GRATEFUL for THE cup HALF FULL ---meanwhile, work for the jug. Me. **"What the Mind harbors, the body manifests. We are light coagulated into matter, frozen light, the body is in the soul not the other way around." The Master Jules ***"It's no good running a pig farm badly for thirty years while saying, 'Really I was meant to dance in the ballet'. By that time PIGS are starting to be your life." Brit personality, superfag Quentin Crisp *** "There are only two kinds of women, goddesses and doormats," Pablo Picasso. ***"Never attempt to expose someone's hypocricy to their face; they'll fight you and they won't get it. But point out the irony of their hypocricy; they'll laugh and immediately get it." Anita and Jules. "Answers hang near us like ripe fruit. The ladder we need to get to them is simply ---the question. Ponder the question." Anita "Life is solitary, nasty, poor, brutish and short" Thomas Hobbs "--and unfortunately, FAR TOO short" Woody Allen. "When you're dating, keep both eyes open; when you're married keep one eye closed." 90 year old Jewish woman, Joanna Feldman, married 60 years. ***"When you get married you trade the attention of a thousand men for the inattention of one." Anon. ***"The oldest living mammal is a rich relative" Dianne Bennett ***" Life without reincarnation is like a one act play. There simply isn't enough time for character development." Albert Taylor author of "Soul Traveller." ***"We are all born mad, some remain so." Anon. ***Plot of all Southern Novels: "On the night the hog ate Lilly, Mom got out the shotgun when she heard what Dad had done to Sister." "When you forgive, a miracle happens. When you tolerate, Hell happens." Me. "Growth for the Sake of Growth is the philosophy of Cancer Cells." Got it on the Net. "Don't throw the Christ Child out with the self-confrontational bathwater" the master Jules."You don't fry bacon when you're naked." Anon. "Alzheimers makes the world new again, daily, hourly minutely everything is like the first time I heard or saw it. A few years of that at the end won't hurt anybody except your kids who have to change your diapers" Anita

WE ARE the SUM TOTAL of WHAT WE EAT, READ, THINK, LEARN and can recall to RECOUNT TO OTHERS LATER. That is the water we're made of and the sum total ripple we make.

Good humor is a tonic for mind and body. It is the best antidote for
anxiety and depression. It is a business asset. It attracts and keeps
friends. It lightens human burdens. It is the direct route to serenity and
contentment.
~Grenville Kleiser

Music washes away from the soul the dust of everyday life.
~Berthold Auerbach

An inexhaustible good nature is one of the most precious gifts of heaven,
spreading itself like oil over the troubled sea of thought, and
keeping the mind smooth and equable in the roughest weather.
~Washington Irving

"It had long since come to my attention that people of accomplishment
rarely sat back and let things happen to them. They went out and
happened to things."
~Elinor Smith

"There are two types of people - those who come into a room and say, "Well,
here I am," and those who come into a room and say, "Ah,
there you are."
~Frederick Collins

"Don't fear failure so much that you refuse to try new things. The saddest
summary of a life contains three descriptions: could have, might
have, and should have."
~Louis E. Boone

"We humans must come again to a moral comprehension of the earth and air.
We must live according to the principle of a land ethic. The
alternative is that we shall not live at all.
~N. Scott Momaday, Kiowa~

Life is an open door. It can be closed at any time, so don't complain about
the draft.
~Author Unknown

Sometimes the squeaky wheel doesn't get the grease, it just gets replaced.
~Author Unknown

When people deserve your love and support the least, that is when they need
it the most.
~Author Unknown

Unless you try to do something beyond what you have already mastered, you
will never grow.
~Author Unknown

Democracy is two wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch.
Liberty is a well-armed lamb contesting the vote!
- Benjamin Franklin, 1759

They that can give up essential liberty to purchase a little temporary
safety deserve neither liberty or safety.
- Benjamin Franklin

A patriot must always be ready to defend his country against his
government.
- Edward Abbey (1927-1989) US author

Liberty lies in the hearts of men and women; when it dies there, no
constitution, no law, no court can save it.
- Judge Learned Hand

Patriotism is the willingness to kill and be killed for trivial reasons.
- Bertrand Russell

If you were going to die soon and had only one phone call you could make,
who would you call and what would you say? And why are you
waiting?
~Stephen Levine

If you approach each new person you meet in a spirit of a adventure, you
will find yourself endlessly fascinated by the new channels of
thought and experience and personality that you encounter. I do not mean
simply the famous people of the world, but people from every walk
of life.
~Eleanor Roosevelt

The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one
persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore all progress
depends on the unreasonable man.
- George Bernard Shaw

Television has proved that people will look at anything rather than each
other.
- Ann Landers

Isn't it interesting that the same people who laugh at science fiction
listen to weather forecasts and economists?
- Kelvin Throop

Hard work spotlights the character of people: some turn up their sleeves,
some turn up their noses, and some don't turn up at all.
~Author Unknown

The problems that exist in the world today cannot be solved by the level of
thinking that created them.
~Albert Einstein

It is one of the most beautiful compensations of this life that no man can
sincerly try to help another without helping himself.
~Ralph Waldo Emerson

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not bost, it is
not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily
angered, it
keeps no record of wrongs...
1 Cor. 13::4-5

Age is a very high price to pay for maturity.
~Author Unknown

If you can't see the bright side of life, polish the dull side.
~Author Unknown

Sometimes the majority only means that all the fools are on the same side.
~Author Unknown

You have the capacity to learn from your mistakes. You will learn a lot
today.
~Author Unknown

Expecting people to be nice to you, just because you are nice to them is
like expecting the bull not to charge because you are a vegetarian.
~Author Unknown

Real friends are those who, when you feel you've made a fool of yourself,
don't feel you've done a permanent job.
~Author Unknown

Each day of our lives we make deposits in the memory banks of our children.
~Charles R. Swindoll

My favorite quote is "Life is too short to be little," written by Disraeli.
Often we allow ourselves to be upset by small things we should
despise and forget. We lose many irreplaceable hours brooding over
grievances that, in a year's time, will be forgotten by us and by
everybody. No, let us devote our life to worthwhile actions and feelings,
to great thoughts, real affections and enduring undertakings.
~Andre Maurois

Let go of your attachment to being right, and suddenly your mind is more
open. You're able to benefit from the unique viewpoints of others,
without being crippled by your own judgment.
~Ralph Marston

"Remember not only to say the right thing in the right place, but far more
difficult still, to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting
moment."
~Benjamin Franklin

Spread love everywhere you go: first of all in your own house... let no one
ever come to you without leaving better and happier. Be the living
Expression of God's kindness; kindness in your face, kindness in your eyes,
kindness in your warm greeting.
~Mother Teresa

For every action, there is an equal and opposite government program.
~Author Unknown

Heaven goes by favor, if it went by merit, you would stay out, and your dog
would go in. --Mark Twain

Children seldom misquote you. In fact, they usually repeat word for word
what you shouldn't have said.
~Author Unknown

We learn from experience. A man never wakes up his second baby just to see
it smile.
~Grace Williams

Confront a child, a puppy, and a kitten with a sudden danger; the child
will turn instinctively for more assistance, the puppy will grovel in
abject submission, the kitten will brace its tiny body for a frantic
resistance.
~Hector Hugh Munro

Sit down before fact as a little child, be prepared to give up every
conceived notion, follow humbly wherever and whatever abysses nature
leads, or you will learn nothing.
~Thomas Huxley

My mind works like lightning. One brilliant flash and it is gone.
~Author Unknown

It used to be only death and taxes were inevitable. Now, of course, there's
shipping and handling, too.
~Author Unknown

If your outgo exceeds your income, it won't be long before your upkeep is
your downfall.
~Author Unknown

I've learned that whenever I decide something with kindness,  I usually
make the right decision.
~Author Unknown

No matter what happens, or how bad it seems today, life does go on, and it
will be better tomorrow.
~Author Unknown

The best thing about the future is that it only comes one day at a time.
~ Abraham Lincoln

It is not because things are difficult that we do not dare; it is because
we do not dare that things are difficult.
~Seneca

I need to take an emotional breath, step back and remind myself who's
actually in charge of my life.
~ Judith Knowlton

It is better to keep your mouth shut and look like a fool, than to open
your mouth and remove all doubt.
~Author Unknown

The founding fathers, in their wisdom, devised a method by which our
republic can take one hundred of its most prominent numskulls and
keep them out of the private sector where they might do actual harm.
~P. J. O'Rourke

The little unremembered acts of kindness and love are the best of a good
man's life.
~William Wordsworth

"Take the most difficult challenge you are now facing and turn it into the
greatest opportunity to grow simply by changing how you see it.
Dead ends then become turning points."
~Bob Perks

The truth often hurts, but it is the lie that leaves the scar.
~Author Unknown

Accept that some days you're the pigeon, and some days you're the statue.
~Author Unknown

Whatever challenges us -- the doubts, the fears, the angers, all the forms
of negativity that come at us -- all of it ends up strengthening us.
~John Morton

The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a
replacement.
~Author Unknown

Love does not cost money. Where love is present, miracles happen. The
closing of the American Heart is the greatest threat  to our national
good.
- Marianne Williamson, from: Illuminata

The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.
~Unknown

Life is like an onion; you peel off one layer at a time and sometimes you
weep.
~Author Unknown

Real friends are those who, when you feel you've made a fool of yourself,
don't feel you've done a permanent job.
~Author Unknown

Unless you try to do something beyond what you have already mastered , you
will never grow. We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence
then, is not an act but a habit. If you want to succeed, double your
failure rate.
~Thomas J. Watson

Education is what you get from reading the small print; experience is what
you get from not reading it.
~Author Unknown

If you start thinking you're a person of influence, try ordering somebody
else's dog around.
~Author Unknown

Children are natural mimics; they act like their parents in spite of every
effort to teach them good manners.
~Author Unknown

A man may make many mistakes, but is not a failure until he starts blaming
someone else for them.
~Author Unknown

This the last of human freedoms--to choose one's attitude in any given set
of circumstances, to choose ones own way.
~ Victor Frank

Security is mostly a superstition. It does not exist in nature, nor do the
children of men as whole experience it. Avoiding danger is no safer in
the long run than outright exposure. Life is either a daring adventure or
nothing.
~ Helen Keller

If you see a whole thing- it seems that it's always beautiful. Planets,
lives...But up close a world's all dirt and rocks. And day to day, life's a
hard job, you get tired, you lose the pattern.
~ Ursula Le Guin

A good scare is worth more to a man than good advice.
~ Edgar Watson Howe

To sit quiet and think, is the hardest thing a person can do, for when he
does, all the Demons of the universe, show up and try to keep him
from the truth. But these Demons must be faced, then slayed, in order to
live a life worth living.
~ R.H. Lascelle

3 Confucius Quotes

Exploring the old and deducing the new makes a teacher. To learn without
thinking is labor in vain, to think without learning is desolation. To
acknowledgewhat is known as known, and what is not known as not known is
knowledge.

War is seldom about a real conflict between two peoples, much more
frequently about the egos of their leaders. The ancient Greeks
developed customs that permitted the leaders of two armies to engage in
one-on-one combat that spared their general engagement. Later, this
was further ritualized into Olympic competitions that satisfied a few men's
needs to dominate while avoiding loss of life and damage to
property.
~Author Unknown

"The best way to destroy an enemy is to make him a friend."
-- Abraham Lincoln

All that you want to be, you already are. All you have to do is move your
awareness there and recognize the reality of your own Soul.
~ John-Roger

"Grown-ups never understand anything by themselves, and it is tiresome for
children to be always and forever explaining things to them."
-Antoine de Saint-Exupery

Every parent tries to mold his child in his own image. Luckily, we never
succeed. The best result we can hope for is to watch our children
build on our core values of love and truth, and create possibilities that
transcend anything we might have dreamed on our own.
~Author Unknown

I don't have to attend every argument I'm invited to.
~Author Unknown

Somebody once figured out that we have 35 million laws trying to enforce 10
commandments.
~Author Unknown

A person is grown up not when they can take care of themselves, but when
they can take care of others.
~Author Unknown

If you are not living on the edge, you take up too much room.
~Native American saying

Remember no one can make you feel inferior without your consent.
~Roosevelt, Eleanor

If you think you are too small to be effective, you have never been in bed
with a mosquito.
~Betty  Reese

Perfect valour consists in doing without witnesses that which we would be
capable of doing before everyone.
~ Francois Duc de La Rochefoucauld

Your worst days are never so bad that you are beyond the reach of God's
grace. And your best days are never so good that you are beyond
the need of God's grace.
~Author Unknown

Every morning I wake up grateful for my  family, for new friends and old,
who never cease to surprise and delight me, for love and
connections and sharing.
~Author Unknown

Dogs have given us their absolute all. We are the center of their universe.
We are the focus of their love and faith and trust. They serve us in
return for scraps. It is without a doubt the best deal man has ever made.
~Roger Caras

When you are young, you want to be the master of your fate and the captain
of your soul. When you are older, you will settle for being the
master of your weight and the captain of your bowling team.
~Author Unknown

Wisdom is made up of two parts. 1) Having a lot to say, and 2) not saying it.
~Author Unknown

The peak years of mental activity are between the ages of four and
eighteen. At four they know all the questions, at eighteen they know all
the answers.
~Author Unknown

"Go around asking a lot of damn fool questions and taking chances. Only
through curiosity can we discover opportunities, and only by
gambling can we take advantage of them."
~ Clarence Birdseye

"Do not follow the ideas of others, but learn to listen to the voice within
yourself. Your body and mind will become clear and you will realize
the unity of all things."
Dogen (1200-1253) Japanese religious leader

Patience and perseverance have a magical effect before which difficulties
dissapear and obstacles vanish.
~John Quincy Adams
 
 
 "Couples shouldn't fight. When there's too much buckshot in a pheasant nobody eats."